Cheeseburgers, the building block for every football team

The more I watched, the less I liked, but slowly Holgorsen has been evolving into my way of thinking.

In each of his first two games, for example, he ran the football significantly more than he threw it, so much so that West Virginia has 85 rushes and just 58 passes thrown. It hasn’t hurt his passing production any, each time throwing for more than 300 yards, but it has made his offense less risky, which is evident by a lack of any turnovers, while becoming less predictable.

The most telling moment of the change came on the Mountaineers’ second possession of the Liberty game, sitting on their own 48-yard line on 3rd-and-15 as everyone in Mountaineer Field anticipated a pass.

But Holgorsen must have found one of Don Nehlen’s old playbooks hidden away in some dark office closet. Quarterback Skyler Howard took the snap, took a step back as if it were a pass play, then headed down field on — of all things — a draw play.

This, of course, was the Nehlen staple and probably was as responsible as any one play for turning him into a Hall of Fame coach.

Holgorsen now understands why, because it was 34 yards before Howard’s run came to an end, a first down leading to a field goal and a 6-0 lead.

You knew Nehlen, up a suite, was smiling, as were the likes of Amos Zereoue and Avon Cobourne and a number of other running backs who had their number called on 3rd-and-long draw plays over the years … plays that the fans often criticized but plays that came to be the WVU offensive trademark.

The vibes now were beginning to mesh between the modern era coach and the sportswriter who first started covering professional football as a beat 48 years ago, but it wasn’t until Holgorsen’s Tuesday press conference that he showed he was ready to come over to the other, just as I was beginning to accept what he was doing.

You see he mentioned that there were some of his younger wide receivers who had not yet become proficient at blocking downfield and that is a necessity if they are to play.

It was his “cure” for this that won me over.

“They need more cheeseburgers,” he said.

At last, someone has recognized what truly is the breakfast of champions.

From Wimpy and his insatiable appetite for cheeseburgers to John Belushi and his “Chee-burger, chee-burger” skit on “Saturday Night Live”, cheeseburgers are America’s favorite food … even more than those other tradition American dishes pizza, tacos and sushi.

And, it is safe to say, that no one has ever eaten more cheeseburgers than I have and I haven’t missed a downfield block since 1958.

Of course, I haven’t tried one since then, but we’ll just keep that between ourselves.

See, everyone these days is trying to cram health food down your throat. Carbs, proteins. If it’s green, it’s good.

Yes, sir, they say, you eat your way to greatness. Or do you? Babe Ruth’s choice of “health food” was a dozen hot dogs and a bucket of beer and last time anyone looked they were still talking about how good he was 100 years after he broke into baseball.

All this muscle stuff may be good to look at, but give me William “The Fridge” Perry running his 400 or so pounds up the middle on the goal line or one-time Atlanta reliever Terry Forster, whose nickname was “The Fat Tub of Goo”, getting the last out of a game.

It was David Letterman who dubbed Forster a “Fat Tub of Goo,” calling him “the fattest man in professional sports.” Forster was mad at first but Letterman apologized and in 1985 Forster came on the show, his appearance being named the top sports moment in Letterman history by FOX Sports.

He came toting what he called a “David Letterman Sandwich,” noting the prime ingredient was “lots of tongue”, and told Letterman that during games he used to bribe fans with autographed baseballs to go get him hot dogs.

There’s something about being rotund that trumps even the most cut athletes, Wes Ours of WVU fame coming to mind from his fullback days. In fact, our favorite version of 335-pound guard Quinton Spain was not the slimmed down one trying to play his way into the NFL as a senior, but the puffed up, shy freshman who was simply a large sized figurine of ourselves.

There is a lesson in all this, when lunch comes around tomorrow, jump in that car. Get yourself a Big Mac, a Whopper or a Double Baconator and put on Jimmy Buffet doing “Cheeseburger in Paradise.” It might just help win you a football scholarship.